What a difference a day Makes

***Before you read this, let me tell you I am kinda all over the place so I am sorry!!***

Yesterday, after my meeting I felt broken and defeated. My biggest problem wasn't so much that I had gained weight. It wasn't the first time and I am sure it won't be the last, what had me feeling this way was the fact that I really didn't know what I had done to cause me to gain 2.2 lbs.

In the past this would have been enough to cause me to quit and give up. But not this time!! Instead I decided to do something about it. I talked to my meeting leader and she gave me an idea of what may have happened. I turned my "downfall" into something positive.

Yesterday I sat down and wrote out a new "workout" plan. I think this will help me get where I need to be. I also decided that I am going to refocus on my running. Instead of doing it on my own, I decided that I will probably do better using the Couch to 5K program. I restarted my training today and I killed it!! With the jogger stroller and all!!

I also had a different mind set today. It seemed like everyone around me knew that yesterday was a bad day for me and I had a sign around my neck that said "I need a pick me up" While I was running there was a group of college students (all men) that smiled at me....and not in the laughing at me way either :-) People kindly moved over to make room and I felt that people were cheering me on!!

I am totally ready to do it again tomorrow! I tracked all my food today and I can tell yo that as I sit here writing this at 7:30 pm I have already reached 100% of my activelink goal for today. I did a total of just over 5 miles and a small ab workout. If I do this everyday I know that I will be able to easily run a 5K but Sept 1st. I will also be able to reach my weight loss goals.

Someone said some very mean and hurtful things to me today as well. I was called a lazy fat ass. Considering the source I didn't let it bother me because this person is always the type to always want to hurt me for some reason. Before this would have hurt me but today I was able to say "how exactly and I am lazy fat ass? I run everyday and I walk, clocking at least 5 miles a day. Plus I have lost 30 lbs!" yes I am over weight but I am doing something about it. This person too is over weight and could loose a good 50 lbs and instead of her doing something to change it, she is stuffing her face with hot pockets and pizza rolls!! So while she can slowly kill herself with all that crap I will continue to better myself.

I have changed so much in the past six months. I am no longer the person that will allow what other say hurt me. I know my own reality and I know what I am capable of. I am strong and determined. I am going to better myself. I am not just getting healthier physically but mentally and spiritually as well. One day this person will look at all that I have done and wish they were as happy as me.

I know that I can do this!! I will do this!! There will be some days that will be better than others but I can not let those days bring me down. I will use these days to motivate me and bring me that much closer to my goal.