Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Tomorrow is a new day

And a new month in this case. I don't know why so don't ask but for whatever reason I decided to weigh myself before going to my weight watchers meeting today. Well according to my scale I had gained 2.6 lbs!!!

This sent me into a total downward spiral!! I started crying and was very upset. I for the life of me can't figure out what happened to cause me to gain weight this week. I got in my activity. I drank my water and I tracked my food!! I do have my period but that has never had any type of impact and caused me to gain before.

So I did something that would kinda help me feel better and it was def better than eating like I used to when I would get upset. I got in my car, blasted the radio (which I couldn't get loud enough) and I drove. I had to go to staples so I went and then I got my son from school.

I tried to talk to a very good friend about my problem and I love her and poor girl, no matter how hard she tried I didn't really feel any better. I kept telling myself I would be ok and it was no big deal but the truth is, I was PISSED!!! I think I would have been just fine with a gain if I could say "oh I did this or I did that" but I can't.

I talked to my meeting leader about it and she seems to think that I could be eating too much salt and that my period my have something to do with it. My plan for this week is to drink even more water than usual and limit my salt in take. I am also going to increase my workouts. This is something that I have wanted to do, not just because of the gain this week.

This week, well today was a serious struggle for me. But I am not going to let it define me or my journey. I will only allow it to motivate me. I will push harder and stay with the plan because I know it works. I will update you all during the week and let you know how I am doing and next week I will have an exciting loss to share with you!!

Monday, April 29, 2013

How did I get here?

This is something that I ask myself quite often. Sure you can say that I have had two children and it's "harder" to loose baby weight. Or whatever else you want but the fact of the matter is, I let myself get this way.

You could even go as far to say that I caused my weight to get so out of control. It started well before I had children. As a teenager I never did anything that would allow me to maintain a healthy weight.

When my husband and I started dating I was already overweight and he enjoyed taking me out to dinner. Of course I'm not one of those "oh I'll just get a salad" type of girls so all that unhealthy food added to the fact that I was lazy equaled added weight.

When I had my son you would think I would want to get healthy for him but NOPE!! I just stayed the way I was. When he was one I got pregnant with my daughter and gained another 60 lbs. When it's all said and done, I did this to myself.

If you are looking for an actual reason as to how or why my weight has gotten so out of control GOOD LUCK!! I can't tell you that for sure. What I can tell you is that I have several health issues that run in my family, none of which I have right now but I know that my weight can cause these problems to be worse.

I have decided that no matter the reason I am overweight I know the reasons to put an end to it:
  1. I need to be around for my children
  2. I refuse to be embarrassed my a broken camp chair (This is the main reason I joined weight watchers. I was slightly over the weight limit on my camp chair and I was always scared that I was going to break it)
  3. I am tried of seeing cute clothes and thinking it won't look cute on me
  4. I want to for me!!!
  5. Now that I have started loosing weight it's actually fun!!

Sunday, April 28, 2013

No Pain No Gain

Or so they say....Well in my case I don't want a gain, but you know what "they", (whoever they are) mean. Well I decided that I am actually going to do some ok one of the many workouts that I downloaded on my phone a few weeks ago. Let me tell you anyone that says seven minutes isn't enough, DON'T LISTEN!!!!

I am not an expert my any means but I will tell you I did a seven minute ab workout and boy did I feel it in the morning, I pushed through the pain though and did it again today! I was even able to do hold a plank for 20 seconds!!! Sometimes I wonder just how much I am doing but I know in the long run it will pay off. I will be in better shape and I will be healthier.

Speaking of healthier, I made some GREAT 3 point pizza rolls for dinner Friday. See as a child my parents would always order pizza or subs for dinner. As an adult this is something that I have carried on and passed down to my child. I know I should have put really who wants to cook every single day? NO ONE!!!!

On Friday however, I decided that even though I didn't want to cook the health of my family was more important and I was going to cook but we could still have our usual pizza dinner.I went to the store and decided to pull out my phone and put the Weight Watchers scanner to use. I scanned everything. I bought some turkey pepperoni, low fat crescent rolls, 2% shredded cheese and organic pizza sauce.

I came home and got to work. I put 1/2 tablespoon of sauce on each roll, followed by 1 tablespoon of cheese and 3 pepperonis. I rolled them up and baked them in the oven. It was super easy and the kids loved them!!!Can you say win-win! I can and did. I even used paper cups and plates so I didn't have to do dishes. Looks like we have a new way to do pizza friday in this house.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Weeks 7 thru 12

I have decided that I am going to add regular entries as well as these "story" entries until I am able to catch up. That will my blog can be current while everyone gets to know me and my thought process a little more. Below is what happened from week seven thru week 12. After this we are a little less than half way through my journey thus far. Week 12 was a big one for me personally!!! Hope you enjoy :-)

Nov 13, 2012 Week 7 Down 2 lbs!!! What a good week. I am really surprised that I was able to loose such a large amount two weeks in a row. Now my goal is to get through next weeks weigh-in without gaining weight.

Nov 20, 2012 Week 8 I did it!!!! I totally had two big weeks and I didn't gain on week three. I am down another .6 this week. I am two months into this thing and I have already lost 12.2 lbs. I am almost to my first goal with weight watchers! 5% here I come :-)

Nov 27, 2012 Week 9 Down 2.4!!! Wow I reached my 5% goal!!! Actually I KILLED IT!!!! This week was pretty stressful personally but I still managed to loose weight. I need to get a handle on how I manage my stress but I must be doing something right.

Dec 4,2012 Week 10 Gained .4 this week. I am totally fine with this gain. It's less than half a pound. It has happened before I will loose that plus some next week.

Dec 11, 2012 Week 11 Gained .4 again this week. Ok well I am still under a pound gained even between the two weeks. The lady at the desk when I weighed in still says " well it's less than half a pound" I say "ummm not when you add it to last week." I'm getting a little pissed!

Dec 18, 2012 Week 12 OK Seriously!!! I am starting to think this damn scale is broken. How the hell did I gain .4 again?!?!?!?!?! Now I am up 1.2!! This is just craziness!! I need to loose more a pound in order to make this up. On a positive note, This isn't enough to make me quit. In the past I would have def decided that I would have been done!! On this day I realized ho different things are this time around. I will be back next week and gain or loose I will face it. IT BETTER BE A LOOSE TOUGH :-)

Am I really doing enough?

This may seem like a silly question to many people but it's a question that I ask myself often. I know I have lost 30.2 lbs since starting my journey but I have never once joined a gym! I often feel like I don't workout enough or as much as I should as much as I can. I think I could loose weight quicker if I went to the gym or if I were to do different workouts at home.

Part of my problem is I feel like someone is always watching me and I worry about what others think about me. I recently started training to run a 5K in Sept. I started by just walking everyday and now I am able to run for about a third of a mile without stopping. I run alone either around a local lake or just around my neighborhood. When I do this though I get this feeling like everyone is staring at me thinking "what the hell?" Or "How does her fat ass do that?" I think this even when there isn't anyone around.

But at the same time, there are days that I will run with my daughter in the jogger stroller and I feel people staring at me but now I feel good about it. I think they are thinking "wow! look at her push herself" or "it can't be easy to run with that stroller" I am not sure why I struggle with these feelings so much but I do.

I walk over 5 miles almost everyday and I run almost everyday as well. I know everyone has to start somewhere but I am starting to feel like I need to do more. I need to go to a gym and work the machines. But I love being outside!!

SO here's my goal for next week: I will look up new exercises that I can do that will help me get in better shape. Because my journey isn't just about getting skinny, it's about getting healthy!! Today a friend sent me a text asking me if I was able to do a plank for 30 seconds.....HALF A MINUTE!!! The answer HELL NO!!! I am so out of shape I cant even hold it long enough to get set :-(

Everyone will fall but what's important is how many times you get back up!! If you fall eight times get up nine!!!

Progress Through week 6

OK so I am not yet to the point where I am comfortable sharing my weight with the whole world yet but I will share my progress with you!!

This blog would have gotten WAY out of control if I had updated you all at once on my progress so far so I have decided that I will update you about 6 weeks at a time depending on my thoughts for each week!! Here's the day I joined through week 6. Enjoy!!!!

Sept 25,2012-The day I joined weight watchers to change my life forever!! My current weight makes me want to cry! I have no idea how or better yet why I let myself get so big. I always knew my weight was getting out of control but for the first AND last time in my life I am closer to 300 lbs than not!! I was very embarrassed even though the only other person that knew my actual weight was the woman at the next and she is soooo super sweet!!

Oct 2,2012- Week 1 That wasn't too bad and I am down 4.6 lbs this week. I am glad that C is here with me! It really helps that I don't have to do this alone. I pulled a pretty big number this week. It's a great way to start this journey.

Oct 9,2012 Week 2 Down another 1.2!! YAY!! That first 5 came off with pretty much no problem. This might not be so bad after all. By this point I think this time is going to be different then the other times I have joined.

Oct 16,2012 Week 3 I gained .2 this week. Well maybe this is just like every other time I have joined. I guess it's still too soon to tell and it is only .2 so it's really like staying the same. But I really thought that I would have lost since it's still so early in this journey.

Oct 23,2012 Week 4 Down 2.6!!! Well that def made up for last week!! I think I can totally do this!! I am soooo glad that C and I drive together. Talking to her and being able to share this with her I think has really helped me.

Oct 30,2012 Week 5 Gained .6 Well that's just over a half pound. This week is Halloween tough, I really hope I can stay out of the kids candy so I don't gain again. I think I will be ok. Plus I will get alot of walking in taking the kids trick or treating.

Nov 6,2012 Week 6 Down 2.0!!! That's great!! I am now at a total of 9.6 lbs lost!!! That's sooo close to 10!! Pretty sure this is almost the most I have ever lost!! I think know that doing this with such a good friend and someone that is focused has really helped me and kept me on track this time around.

    ***Look for more posts to come soon and see what happened after this!!!***

My Story

Hi there!! I am a 26 year old that has struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember. In Sept I was talking to a friend who said she had just joined weight watchers. I thought WOW I need to do that and the next week I went to a meeting with her and I did!! This isn't the first time I have tried to loose weight or even my first time with Weight watchers for that matter but this is the journey of the first time I decided to loose weight for ME!!!

When I was about 18 I joined weight watchers with my mom as a "support person" I lost weight but I didn't want to loose weight for me. I didn't realize that I needed to get healthy, I have never had any real health problems so I didn't think my being heavy was a "real" issue.

As I got older my boyfriend and I got more serious and we started talking about marriage and having children. I decided that I didn't want to get pregnant and "have" to gain weight at the weight I was at so I went back to weight watchers. Again I was doing ok and loosing a small amount of weight each week. I didn't really pay much attention and I forgot to take my birth control a couple of days and I ended up getting pregnant....OOPS!!! Oh well! I stopped going to weight watchers but only gained 18 lbs during my pregnancy.

I lost all that weight plus an extra 15-20 lbs. On my son's first birthday, we found out that I was once again pregnant. This time though I gained 60!!! pounds and I never lost any of it! :( Now my daughter is two years old and I am more than ready to change my life.

As of the start of the blog I have lost 30.2 lbs total!! I will be  adding another post that will list my progress each week with a few notes from my personal journal as to how I was feeling and what I had going on that week.

I will use this blog to keep in touch with all of my followers and keep track of my feelings during my journey. I want  others to know that everything isn't going to just fall into your lap, you MUST work for it!!

Thank you for taking time to read this and I hope you are able to find what you are looking for! :-)